Self-Compassion break: 1st acknowledge what is present mindfully without judgement. ie. “This is a moment of suffering.” or “Self-judgment is present”. That’s Mindfulness. Next, practice Common Humanity by acknowledging that you are not alone. Lots of other people are also suffering right now. Lastly, practice self-kindness through using an affirmation or mantra that fits for you as you inhale and exhale, such as, “May I accept myself as I am”. Visit self-compassion.org for more resources.

STOP: S: Stop what you are doing. T: Take 5 deep, slow breaths (which slows down panic/hyper-arousal). O: Observe what is happening in your body and also around you (temperature, texture, sights, sounds, sweating, nature, other people). P: Proceed with loving-kindness (Check in: Am I calm? If not, repeat).

Movement: Even 5-10 minutes of exercise that gets your heart rate up is enough to bring a shift in your nervous system from high stress/anxiety into a more regulated state. Moving your body is one of the best ways to cope with negative thoughts and strong emotions. Engage your body in a walk/run, dancing, bike riding, a hike, some Yoga poses that feel good.

5-4-3-2-1: This is a great distress tolerance and crisis survival skill to practice anywhere. See 5 things that catch your eye, touch 4 things you can feel (within reach), listen for 3 sounds you can hear, identify 2 smells, and lastly taste 1 thing mindfully. Breathe deeply as you notice what you are seeing/feeling/hearing/smelling/tasting, and relax as you arrive in the present moment.

TIPP: a DBT skillset for surviving a crisis. Don’t need to do these in order. T: Tip the temperature of your face with cold water on a cloth for 30 seconds. I: Intense Exercise for 10-15 min. P: Paced breathing - slow the pace of your breathing down as you inhale and count to 5, and as you exhale and count to 6. This will help your nervous system return to a calm state within a few min. P: Progressive muscle relaxation - Tense each muscle group (hold your breath a few seconds) head to toe, and exhale as you relax the muscle group. Repeat if needed until calm.

Box Breathing: As you inhale, visualize drawing the left side of the box going up as you count to 4. Hold your breath as you mentally draw the line at the top of the box and count to 4. Exhale as you visually draw the right side of the box for 4 counts. Hold your breath for 4 counts as you draw the bottom of the box right to left. Repeat for 1-3 min.

Guided Meditation: There are many apps that offer free guided meditations. Some people like Insight Timer, the Calm app, and there are many on YouTube. Pick one with the time you have available and someone’s voice you like. Find a comfortable seat removed from distractions. Begin to notice your breath.

Creative Expression: Make something. Paint/write a card for someone you care about/yourself, and send it. Write affirmations about your strengths, and post it where you can see it. Cook or bake something that sounds delicious. Paint a picture. Make a collage. Color. Sew. Knit. Mend your life one small, enjoyable project at a time. Let yourself play!

Embracing: Ask for a hug (your dog/cat, a trusted friend, or hug yourself arms across chest; breathe and feel yourself being embraced)

Squeezing: your forearms as you breathe and acknowledge, “this is my body. I’m safe now. My body is good.”

Aromatherapy: Adding an essential oil you like to your bath/shower/pillow/the dish water is a small, yet significant mood booster.

Spiritual Connection: Some people find spiritual connection through prayer, music, song, writing, stories, going to a sacred space, Yoga, hiking, painting, dancing, meditating, being alone or together. There are many ways to connect. What works for you?

Recommended Reading and Listening:

On Getting Unstuck: Untangling a book by Barbara McGavin and Ann Weiser Cornell (audiobook free on Spotify for a limited time)

On Codependency: Are You A High Functioning Codependent? with Terri Cole (2-part series on podcast, We Can Do Hard Things, Season 2); Codependent No More, a book by Melody Beattie

For Emotional Connection and Regulation: Atlas of the Heart a book by Brene Brown; The Dance of Connection a book by Harriet Lerner

Trauma Healing Support: Waking the Tiger, a book by Peter Levine; Trauma and Recovery, a book by Judith Herman, MD; The Body Keeps the Score, a book by Bessel van der Kolk

Addiction Support: The Craving Mind, a book by Judson Brewer

Insomnia/sleep support: Yoga Nidra: Melatonin Magic audio by Jenifer Piercy on the Insight Timer app (free)

This list of resources is updated once per quarter.